My Face Remains...

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{I can't remember
When I was young
I can't explain
If it was wrong
My life goes on
But not the same
Into your eyes
My face remains}

Her face haunted him, haunted his dreams - his subconscious and his wakened mind alike on a nightly basis.  Often, he found himself tossing and turning in bed at night, to the point that he couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard he tried, how desperately he willed for respite.

{*I've been so high*
I've been so down
*Up to the skies*
Down to the ground}

Although rest was really what he was seeking, it wasn't quite like that.  Once he fell asleep, he was plagued by the dreams.  Her beautiful face visited him night after night, and he although he did forget some of his nocturnal visions, he tended to remember them more often than not.

{I was so blind
I could not see
Your paradise...
...Is not for me}

Paradise... That was what it had felt like for him when they'd been together.  Life with her had been sheer paradise.  They'd rarely ever argued in the two years they'd been together, and even when they did have a disagreement, it would happily end fairly quickly.

{All around me
I could not see
Who are the angels
Surely not me
Once more again
I am broken
Once more again
I don't believe it}

But then, everything had come crashing down around them.  She'd been wrenched from his life so cruelly, so swiftly - too swiftly.  It wasn't fair.  It wasn't supposed to be like this.  He loved her, damn it... And she loved him.

{I've been so high
I've been so down
Up to the skies
Down to the ground}

He didn't understand how life could be so cruel.  What had either of them done to deserve this?  How could she be taken away from him like that?  She should have been allowed to spend the rest of her life where she wanted - right here with him, in his arms, in his bed, in his life...

{There is a light
Above my head
Into your eyes
My face remains...}

Adam Copeland let out a deep sigh as he rolled over onto his left side on his hotel room bed.  His eyes were wide open, and he knew he wouldn't be getting any sleep - again.  Another sleepless night awaited him.

Sometimes, he wished he could be hypnotized into forgetting her - forgetting her face, her lovely smile, the fragrant, fresh scent of lilacs of her rich auburn hair, her soft, full lips which had always kissed him so tenderly, passionately... Life would be so much easier for him if he could only be made to forget.

But that would be the coward's way out.  Adam had never considered himself to be weak or spineless, and he wasn't about to start now.  Besides, as the old cliche said, better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all... And he wasn't sure he would ever really want to forget her.

Damn it... The hotel beds, like his own bed at home, always felt so cold, so empty - just as they consistently had for the past eight months - ever since she'd left him alone.  He felt as though his heart were frozen.  One thing was for certain, and he knew this with every fiber of his being...

...He would never love anyone like he'd loved her - like he still loved her.

Adam tucked his head slightly so that his chin was just touching his chest, curling himself tighter in the fetal position in which he lay.  He cursed whatever force had caused her to be snatched away from him, this great misery along with it, as a single tear slipped down his right cheek.





Part 2

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