Jay had left her more than an hour earlier, and her tears had finally dried.  However, she knew her mind would give her no rest, and she didn't expect to get any sleep that night.

All she had on in the room was a small lamp beside the bed, so it was fairly dim.  She was studying the intricate patterns of shadows up on the ceiling as she continued thinking about Adam - continued worrying about him.

She'd been so horrible at the end - what a rotten girlfriend she'd been.  Yes, it had been her neck injury, and her physical pain, but she'd been so incredibly selfish - and she despised herself for it.  She hadn't given a single thought to the fact that Adam had wanted to be there for her, to support her with his love, and in any way he wished.  She hadn't given him a choice - no, she'd taken the coward's way out in breaking up with him during the most difficult time in her life - when she really needed him most.  She'd claimed she didn't want to drag him down into the tide that was her ocean of despair - even though she'd known the blond man would never have even so much as blinked at the mere idea.

"Amy, what...What are you talking about?" Adam asked softly, a flicker of fear and hurt visible in his emerald green eyes.

"Just what I said...I'm breaking up with you..."  She blinked as twin tears fell from her eyes.

"Ames, baby...This is not you talking.  I know you're depressed because of your neck, but-"

"It is me talking, Adam!" she cried.  "Look at me...listen to me.  Didn't the words just leave my lips?"  Without waiting for a response to her obviously rhetorical question, she plundered on.  "I don't want to upset you..."

"What exactly do you think you're doing right now?!" he shot, staring her directly in the eye, a touch of anger in his voice.  "I don't understand you - you want to break it off with me now, of all times?  You're just going to throw it all away?  Damn it... We've invested two years in this relationship - we live together!  We bought this house together..."

"You can keep the house..." Amy said, surprised by the evenness of her voice.  "It's only fair since I'm ending it with you."

"God damn it, Amy!" the tall blond Canadian man yelled as he stood up and positioned himself before her, his handsome face now completely filled with anger.  "I don't give a fuck about the house!  All I ever wanted was you!"

The injured redhead winced as more tears streamed down her cheeks.  The truth was, she was hurting just about as badly as he was right now.  In fact, she downright hated herself at the very moment.  Damn it... Why couldn't she do anything right?  It had been bad enough that she'd fallen on her head in her very first scene shooting Dark Angel... But as much as she wanted to hold onto this man with everything she had, she couldn't ruin his life - and she would mess up his life if she stayed with him.

Finally, she managed to speak.  "Let's face it, Adam...Your life would be so much better without me in it..."

Damn it... She'd often wondered what Adam saw in her in the first place - in her own eyes, she wasn't the smartest woman around, certainly not the prettiest - although he'd often told her she was beautiful, she just never saw herself as such.  Why would he want to stay with her?

"I swear, I can't believe my ears!" the tall blond man cried, bringing both hands up to his head.  "Where in hell is all this coming from?!"  He stared at her, examining her face expectantly.

"Adam...I'm sorry," was all the redhead could manage.  She couldn't believe she wasn't emitting choking sobs, as the tears were still running down her face and probably wouldn't stop anytime soon.  She knew she must look a real mess.

"Damn it, Amy!  I want to marry you someday..." Adam admitted, his expression transforming from anger to grief in the span of a few seconds.  A single tear trickled from his left eye, down his cheek.

The diva gazed at him, her breath catching, not only at the fact that he too was crying, but also at his confession.  Oh, God... He actually wanted to marry her... She wanted the very same thing - she loved him so deeply, so intensely.  But she couldn't do it...

Amy shut her eyes tightly against the glare of the bedside lamp.  The heartbreaking memories were too much for her to bear, and she suddenly found herself sobbing bitterly.  She turned onto her right side, facing the wall.

And then, just as suddenly as her crying had started up again, it ceased.  She sat up in the bed, knees drawn up to her chest for a beat as she thought about how very much she wanted - no, needed - to speak to Adam.

The redhead turned again, swinging her legs over the side of the bed, her hand traveling over to the nightstand, fingers closing around her cell phone.  She flipped the device open, biting her lip gently as she began to dial a phone number forever etched in her memory.  And then, before she even held the phone up against her ear, she completely wimped out and cancelled the call.

She cursed herself out loud, calling herself a coward and a fool, but it was just as well.  She realized she would much rather speak to him in person.  And because No Way Out was a mere three days away, she would get that chance.

Amy placed her cell phone back on the nightstand, turned off the lamp and slipped beneath the blanket.  As she tried to make herself comfortable, she wiped her tears away.  She knew she would have to be strong for Adam when she saw him this Sunday - she had to be strong.  She couldn't afford to be a weakling, as she'd been during her own neck injury...